Parents! I am going to pitch you an idea I have just come up with, and it is the best idea ever.
Now, we’ve all watched a children’s movie more times than we’d like admit. My two love Ice Age 5. Not 1, 2, 3, or 4 – just 5. I can tell you the script of by heart, and I could probably put each scene in order – frame for frame – within 2 minutes. We watched it four times yesterday and it was only 11AM!!
So I say to DreamWorks, Pixar, Disney and whoever else is reading (probably), can we make a movie but with multiple endings? You know, like the books you can get…?
I’m sure this can be done. Considering how far animation has come over the years, this should be a breeze!
You can make the story so much more interesting! You could even go the other way with endings of kids films entirely!
So instead of Andy finding Buzz, Woody and the rest of the gang, it could take a sad twist and he loses them forever. As harsh as it sounds, it’d be educational. You know, sometimes it doesn’t end well, life’s a bitch.
You could add an alternative option when the other parent-fish asks Nemo’s dad to tell them a joke. Add in a funny joke that’s slightly edgy so the adults can have a chuckle too!
You could even add a fight scene at the end of The Gruffalo, when the mouse starts giving it large about everyone else being afraid of him, and the Gruffalo runs off. Add an option in that makes the Gruffalo and “hard-as-nails mouse” have a straightener. I’d watch that shit 27,000 times with a bit more enthusiasm then!
You could even throw one into Frozen. Instead of Elsa having a bitch fit when she’s found out of being a witch, she could just go ape-shit instead and kill everyone with her ice powers and create an army of Olaf’s. Then a team of special forces soldiers are deployed and instructed to take Arendelle back, and destroy Elsa and her Olaf army. Much more entertaining!
I know you are probably persuaded to do all this by now, and I’m not surprised; it’s a great idea. I have given you the pitch of a life time. And before you ask, you can use the flawless alternative endings I’ve listed above.
Get on it!!